I'm starting to think about Autumn Leaves 50M, which is about week away. My thoughts start racing...will it rain?...what should I wear?...can I beat my previous time? And then I stop and will myself to calm. And that's how I want to feel. Calm. When I picture my ideal self running long distances, whether on roads or trails, through mountains or forests or around a little track, I feel calm. No struggle or striving, just effortless movement. That's the frame of mind I want to hold on to going into next week's race and beyond.
And now I think I can finally look back over this past year with a certain sense of awe and pride in my accomplishments. There's no need to be melodramatic. It's not like I was going to die or anything. I was leading a normal life. But still, two years ago I didn't think I'd be fortunate enough to get where I am today. Which is nowhere to most people, but everywhere to me. (I mean that in the sense, who does it really matter to but me and maybe my closest loved ones.) I've worked hard but yeah, I feel like the luckiest gal in the world.
I'm in a good frame of mind.